In reading Acts, Paul's journeys can appear unemotional, almost detached, as someone who is callously traveling with only his mission in mind and without regard to who is left behind. However, if we also read Paul's letters from this time, we hear his heart and longing for the people he tells goodbye.
Every time I think of you - and I think of you often! - I thank God... (1 Cor. 1:4)
Aquila, Priscilla, and the church that meets in their house say hello.
All the friends here say hello.
Pass the greetings around with holy embraces!
And I, Paul—in my own handwriting!—send you my regards...And I love all of you in the Messiah, in Jesus. (1 Cor. 16:19-24)
Every time we think of you, we thank God for you. Day and night you're in our prayers ... Do you have any idea how very homesick we became for you, dear friends? Even though it hadn't been that long and it was only our bodies that were separated from you, not our hearts, we tried our very best to get back to see you. You can't imagine how much we missed you! (1 Thess. 1:2, 2:17-19)There are many goodbyes in my life right now and I'm sure that's why this is catching my attention. As I read this chapter, the faces of those I must say goodbye to began to heap up and I realized the source of some of the underlying sadness I'm feeling. In the midst of the end-of-school activities, I hadn't taken time to really think about them all. Some goodbyes are because my children are moving on to a new school, others are dear friends who are moving away from Austin and leaving us behind.
It's hard to feel that these losses are part of God's purposeful planning, as in Paul's case. He obviously felt the tension of moving forward with God and what that meant that he must leave behind. In life, there is no escaping this tension. Whether we are the ones who stay behind and watch others go or we are the ones who must leave. Bidding farewell to friends is a part of God's movement in us to release all else but Him, to lean on Him in our grief, and to trust Him as we move deeply into relationships where we know we will someday say goodbye ... at least on this side of Heaven.
2 comments:
Staci! I am so blessed by this post and the focus on the goodbyes Paul is saying.
Especially verses 20-21. When they asked him to stay for a longer period, he declined. But on taking leave of them, he said, "I will return to you if God wills," and he set sail from Ephesus.
This is my heart and situation now too as I say goodbye to friends I've made and stayed with for 2 years. It is so hard. "It's hard to feel that these losses are part of God's purposeful planning" and there's definitely also the tension of moving forward with God and what that means I must leave behind. Love the truth that you shared that there's no way to escape this tension. But it's all a part of God's movement in us to release all else but Him, to cling to Him, to lean on Him. And we can be attached and emotional like Paul was. Filled with compassion and it comes through in his letters. So encouraged by how he loved these people he shared with, faithfully continued to share with more who didn't know Jesus was the Christ and how he also continued to strengthen the believers on the way. This is my prayer that I would be like Paul and the way he followed Jesus at this time. That I would have my eyes and heart set on Jesus, this time and the mission. :) This speaks to my heart so much that I just feel so not alone. So filled with joy in serving Jesus and having a similar heart and mission as Paul and followers like you, Staci!
Christina, it's so good to know where you are in your current situation and how God is meeting you in the tension. Praying that God's strength will meet you in your loss and tears.
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