Now that they're all on their way to schools and work, I'm left with my overwhelming thoughts, guilt over my lack of trust in God, and wondering how I got here ... again. I know that my life experiences have taught me to expect the worst, it has often been the final outcome. I also know that my God is greater than any harm or disappointment that may come our way. In reading these chapters of Hebrews, the deep, theological truths are what undergirded the very simple word that God encouraged me with this morning,
While we were children, our parents did what seemed best to them. But God is doing what is best for us, training us to live God's holy best. (12:10)What I stay awake at night worrying about for my girls is just that - my best. God is doing what is truly best for them, even when it seems difficult for me to watch and to experience. And in this difficult process of parenting, He's also doing what is best for me. Not circumstantially best, not experientially best, not financially best, not academically best. God's holy best.
At the time, discipline isn't much fun. It always feels like it's going against the grain. Later, of course, it pays off handsomely, for it's the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God. (12:11)God is gently urging me - in the midst of my disappointments and fears - to continue to release my definition of best for His beautiful, awful work of holiness.
2 comments:
Love the oxymoron!
Beautiful Awful Work of God.
How foolish of me to try to get the heavens into my head as Larry always says. I can't wrap my brain around what is happening, what I see, what I know. Titus 2:11 Rain Down Grace that Trains our Passions. Rain it down God! Or else, what?
Just read a verse this morning that so reminded me of you, Cici and Staci. You wrestle well. Here it is, my prayer for you both and for all of us this Christmas. You are greatly loved!
Daniel 9:19-23
O LORD, hear us
O LORD, forgive us
O LORD, pay attention and act
Delay NOT,
And For Your Own Sake,
not for our sake
because this city and these people
are called by Your Name.
Daniel writes that
while he was praying and speaking and confessing his sin and his children's sins, The Man of Gabriel came to him in swift flight to give him understanding:
"Oh, Daniel, I have now come out to give you insight and understanding. At the beginning of your pleas for mercy, a word went out, and I have come to tell it to you, for you are greatly loved."
For God's Sake, may He show up for us all this Christmas. Swift flight! You are greatly loved!
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