"My Son made clear what it meant to dance in rhythm with heaven's kingdom when He preached the sermon on the mount." 66 LLPerfectly ironic since I'm weary and near the end of my rope. I don't feel blessed, I don't have any rhythm, and I certainly don't feel like dancing. Frankly, I feel harassed and helpless, depleted and down.
Yet Jesus says,
You're blessed when you're at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule. (5:3)I needed to hear that today. Honestly, I'm not sure where all of these emotions are coming from, but they feel very real. I know there's a battle raging for my heart and mind because a lot of this is very confusing and seems illogical to me.
"You will hear My voice in Matthew more clearly when you pay close attention to what's happening in people's lives, including your own. I always say what you...most need to hear. See where you are. Then you will hear My truth." 66 LLYou want to know where I am?
Well, I'm aching for my little girl in Rwanda. The waiting has drained my emotional reserves and most of my hope. And of course, I'm feeling inadequate in my role as mom to the two kids I already have. I'm uncertain about my place in ministry because life is so different now, smaller somehow. I hate not having my act together. I feel very scattered. I'm sick of my selfishness, anger, and impatience. I'm weary of feeling like a hypocrite as I write this blog, failing daily in my walk with the Lord.
It's funny that, even as I re-read what I've typed, I can see it's all about me. Sigh. I'm stuck in self-centeredness right now, lost in my circumstances. My flesh has gotten the best of me.
In a word, what I'm saying is, Grow up. You're kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your God-created identity. Live generously and graciously toward others, the way God lives toward you. (5:48)
"Listen closely. This is what I'm saying in My fortieth letter:
My Son's mission was to change your life, to bring you into My kingdom of love by forgiving your self-worshiping rebellion that keeps you falling short of My way of relating and by empowering you to bring My kingdom near to others by the radically changed way you can now relate. He never intended to keep you visibly good and pleasantly happy until heaven. He came to reveal My nature for your sake and to change your nature for Mine." 66 LLFather, forgive me. Forgive my complaining spirit and my demands that You satisfy my wants and desires. Please change the way I relate to You and others. Help me to not lose sight of Your Love Story or of my place in it. Less of me, Lord, and more of You - that's my prayer.
2 comments:
Do you think God sits in a box seat? Am I making a performance out of this? Matthew 6:1,5
Matthe 5:4 ~ "You're blessed when you feel you've lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you."
My husband and I have lost quite a bit. God sent it our way for our good---not sure how but convinced He is not committed to keeping me from suffering but is committed to providing the Power I need to reveal and release Him. We've lost what is most dear in more than one way. But I am embraced by my Good God in ways I never imagined. The world looks on us as failures but not my Beautiful God!
As I read through the Sermon on the Mount this time around, I felt burdened by the high bar it sets. Perfection. Love our enemies. Don't be angry. Don't worry. Be perfect.
Because that's what the Law requires.
Praise Jesus that we are not under the Law, but under grace. Thank you, Jesus, for fulfilling the Law so that we didn't have to...because we would've never been able to!
The Sermon on the Mount makes me realize how terribly short I fall and how greatly I need Jesus to step in and save me!
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