October 27 - Luke 8-9: Don't Run From Suffering

Lately, the topic of suffering has been popping up all over the place. I know what that means; God wants me to listen carefully.  When a specific topic (or verse) comes up in a variety of different and unrelated situations, I know that God is speaking to me.

Then he told them what they could expect for themselves: "Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You're not in the driver's seat - I am. Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self." (9:23-24)

This isn't the message I want to hear. I am the girl who has done my best to avoid suffering. I've dodged hard situations, I've not "gone there" with my emotions, I've walled off parts of my heart, and I've used anger as a cover for hurt and sadness. Suffering? No, thank you.

But now I feel like I'm being exposed on all sides to the potential for huge suffering.

• Following Christ wherever He leads? Suffering.
• Motherhood? Suffering.
• Adoption? Suffering.
• Trusting God with difficult relationships? Suffering.
• Loving others? Suffering.

I'm kind of laughing as I write this. I mean, when I prayed to receive Christ and surrendered to Him what I was aware of at the time, what in the world did I think I was in for?? I really missed the boat. I obviously didn't count the cost; I was far more focused on what was in it for me, specifically the gift of God's forgiveness.

But here it is in black and white. Suffering is part of the deal. It's the process by which I grow to become more like Christ. It's part of the maturation process. Sure, I can continue to try to avoid it, but I'm guessing that God has other plans for me.

"Hear this, you can become apparently mature without My Spirit's power. Human effort is sufficient. But I find no pleasure in what it produces. Peace will come to earth only when I find pleasure in all its inhabitants (Luke 2:14). And that will not happen until everyone is perfectly mature, formed exactly like My Son. Movement toward that desire requires the power of My Spirit, to divide and expose the two roads within you (Luke 12:51) and lead you to wish forward on the right one - the narrow one - to follow in My Son's footsteps." 66 LL

I realize I've settled for apparent maturity for too long, and God has been moving me along toward a desire to be more like Him by causing me to experience suffering in deeper ways. I pray that one of these years, I'll truly be able to say, as Paul does, that I will rejoice at being poured out as a drink offering to the Lord. (Philippians 2:17, 2 Timothy 4:6)

I'm afraid I'm not there yet.