The past few weeks have been difficult as God has used a human shepherd in Eric's and my life to challenge our hearts and vision. I have struggled with what I perceive as misunderstanding and wrong motives that have guided this person's counsel. Yet at the same time, trying to receive the words as if from God and live in the discomfort and wrestle with the implications. We are trying to discern how God wants to use us as shepherds for His flock, knowing our own weaknesses and inadequacies and abilities and hearts. We know that we are broken and selfish shepherds, as all human leaders are. In the midst of this despair and hurt and confusion, God's declaration that He is the Shepherd provides security and hope.
God, the Master, says: 'From now on, I myself am the shepherd. I'm going looking for them. As shepherds go after their flocks when they get scattered, I'm going after my sheep. I'll rescue them...I'll bring them back...I'll feed them...I'll lead them...I myself will make sure they get plenty of rest. I'll go after the lost, I'll collect the strays, I'll doctor the injured. I'll build up the weak ones and oversee the strongs one so they're not exploited...
'I'll appoint one shepherd over them all: my servant David. he'll feed them. He'll be their shepherd. And I, God, will be their god. My servant David will be their prince. I, God, have spoken...
You are my dear flock, the flock of my pasture, my human flock, and I am your God. Decree of God, the Master.' (Ezekiel 36:11-16, 23-24, 31)The one shepherd He has appointed came in the form of His Son. God sent Himself, just as He said He would.
[Jesus speaking] 'I am the Good Shepherd. The Good Shepherd puts the sheep before himself, sacrifices himself if necessary...
'I am the Good Shepherd. I know my own sheep and my own sheep know me. In the same way, the Father knows me and I know the Father. I put the sheep before myself, sacrificing myself if necessary....this is why the Father loves me: because I freely lay down my life. And so I am free to take it up again. No one takes it from me. I lay it down of my own free will.' (John 10:11-18)
The Lamb on the Throne will shepherd them, will lead them to spring waters of Life. (Revelation 7:17)He's not only the Good Shepherd, He also puts Himself in our place as the sheep. The Shepherd became the Lamb, sacrificed Himself and leads us to Life. (This insight is from a sermon by Tim Keller, can't take any credit for it!) What really hits me about this is that Ezekiel 36 tells us why He became the sacrifice - not because I'm special or worthy or have a gift or necessary or can meet any need of His - but because of Himself.
I'm not doing this for you, Israel. I'm doing it for me, to save my character, my holy name which you've blackened....then the nations will realize who I really am, that I am God, when I show my holiness through you so that they can see it with their own eyes. (Ezekiel 36: 22-23)Sort of takes the winds out of my sails. Once again, it's not about me. God sacrificed Himself because of His Holiness and His Holiness alone. Which then leads me to ask why I get so annoyed when people or circumstances make it clear that it's not about me? Why do hurt when people misunderstand or undervalue or question me? Because I don't get it. I still want to make it about my value, my sacrifice, my accomplishments, my reputation.
Not sure if all these ramblings are making sense - the thoughts and conviction are barely formed in my head. In the midst of my gray days and jumbled thoughts, I am holding tight to one anchor:
I'll pour pure water over you and scrub you clean. I'll give you a new heart, put a new spirit in you. I'll remove the stone heart from your body and replace it with a heart that's God-willed, not self-willed. I'll put my Spirit in you and make it possible for you to do what I tell you and live by my commands. (36:24-28)That's my only true hope.
2 comments:
My heart has been so heavy for the past few weeks due to circumstances and my own sin, and I've often come to the Scriptures wanting Ezekiel to encourage me and lift my spirits. Instead, the readings have usually been depressing and harsh, in my opinion. It's been a battle to stay engaged and remain faithful to read and post.
So I really appreciated today's reading. You're right, Staci - there's so much in here that I'm still trying to absorb.
Perhaps it's the Message version, or maybe I've never been this invested as I've read Ezekiel, but I am amazed at how clear God is about His motives, purposes, and plan. It's all right here. Why have I missed it so badly every other time? Why am I so blind??
The verse that jumped out at me today was 36:21.
I suffered much pain over my holy reputation, which the people of Israel blackened in every country they entered.
I don't think I've truly understood that. I certainly experience suffering over other people's sins that impact me, but I never thought of it in terms of my sin causing actual pain and suffering to God. Oh my. Trying to wrap my heart and mind around that one.
Thanks for the thought-provoking post today, Staci. I am so grateful for how God's made you!
Yes, this assignment today-- wow. The same things struck me: ch. 34 in what I first thought was a guide how to shepherd well; however, then He turns it all upside down by saying Jesus is the only true and good shepherd ... or at least I think that's what he's saying. :)
Loved ch. 36 too where he promises to scrub us clean and give us NEW hearts. Oh the process is painful, but thank you, Jesus, for not letting me stay in my pitiful sinful ways! All for YOUR glory, not my betterment.
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