"It's not suffering as such that troubles us. It is undeserved suffering." Eugene Peterson, Introduction to JobAmen to that. I think that's why seeing photos of children living in poverty slays me, or hearing about people who've been kidnapped and enslaved in one form or another around the world frightens me so much.
"One of the real surprises as we get older, however, is that we come to see that there is no real correlation between the amount of wrong we commit and the amount of pain we experience. An even larger surprise is that very often there is something quite the opposite: We do right and get knocked down." Eugene Peterson, Introduction to JobI have known more than one person who has been uninterested or even scared to begin a relationship with Christ because of the suffering they see in the lives of believers. They fear that belief will bring similar suffering on them, and they want to stay as far away from that as possible. Frankly, there's part of me that understands where they're coming from.
I'm a little afraid of it myself. I've seen godly families suffer major health problems for YEARS, and it bothers me. At various times, I've wondered what they've done wrong or what they're not doing right or why God seems to pick on them so unfairly. And I've seen godly families who face unprecedented levels of tragedy or hardship. Honestly, I'm disrupted by such suffering, and I realize that I've subconsciously searched for ways to "live right" in order to avoid that kind of suffering in my own life.
That's why the book of Job is such a challenge for me. It forces me to see God differently, to wrestle with the aspects of Him that confuse me, to embrace the mystery of faith, and to trust Him in ways that I don't really want to.
Frankly, it bugs me immensely that it was God who brought Job to Satan's attention, not the other way around.
God said to Satan, "Have you noticed my friend Job?" (1:8)In my economy, a "good" God doesn't do things like that. Why does He have to invite such suffering into Job's life???
That's where my wrestling begins today. Intellectually, I understand how God uses suffering in our lives, but emotionally, I want to run as fast as I can in the opposite direction from God. I mean, if he really is in control of everything, perhaps I should just stay out of his line of sight. You know, duck my head and avoid His gaze (as if that were possible) so He won't choose me to suffer.
I don't have a nice little bow to tie around these chapters. I'm still reeling from them myself, and I think I'm both running from and wrestling with God about the following statements:
"To know me well, you must first be confused by Me. Only in the mystery of suffering will you stop trying to fit Me into your understanding of Job." 66 LL
He told her, "You're talking like an empty-headed fool. We take the good days from God - why not also the bad days?" (2:10)
"Suffering without explanation creates the opportunity for faith in Me, the kind of faith that sees My heart. Suffering without explanation allows you to maintain the false source of control. In My plan, I remove all sources of hope but Me." 66 LL
Naked I came from my mother's womb, naked I'll return to the womb of the earth. God gives, God takes. God's name be ever blessed. (1:21)
"Learn, too, what My Jewish servant Abraham Heschel discovered, 'God is not nice. God is not an uncle. God is an earthquake.' The world of Christendom, so far removed from Christianity, does not believe that. It does not want to believe that." 66 LL
2 comments:
I can totally relate to wanting to live a good life to ensure that I can avoid suffering. Imagine my surprise when trials and tribulations come! I see the truth now that God is not concerned with my happiness and comfort as much as my relationship and intimacy with Him. And, during those trials and tribulations His presence and comfort are so powerful and almost tangible.
Yet, I think initially I tend to lose my temper when I have to go through yet another hard thing. You'd think I would've learned by now that only in heaven will we be completely without pain and hardship. So, why do constantly forget that? I must remember to do like Job did and really say -blessed be the Lord - no matter what. Just like that song- this is the day that the Lord hath made, I will rejoice and be glad in it!
This is all so counter-Christian-culture! Yet, it rings so true in my heart.
I remember my first performance review in my "real" job as an engineer. I couldn't believe that I didn't get the top rating - I'd worked hard and I felt I deserved an "A". Much to my surprise, they don't give grades in corporate America - they give rankings and not everyone can be #1 and certainly not when you're the young, new female! I was flabbergasted. I'd always been able to work hard enough to get top billing. The situation was a great humiliator and the beginning of many lessons in life about not trusting in my own abilities.
I just want to laugh at Eliphaz's words, "But shouldn't your devout life give you confidence now? Shouldn't your exemplary life give you hope?" (4:6) Just another way of saying, "trust in your good works." Not so much, Eliphaz.
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