I'm realizing the same thing today. While I know I can learn a lot from David - a man after God's own heart - I can also learn quite a bit from hard-hearted King Saul, a man more concerned with himself than God.
How Not to Follow God - Life Lessons from Saul
1) Ignore the inconvenient parts of God's commands
- Here's what you are to do: Go to war against Amalek. Put everything connected with Amalek under a holy ban. And no exceptions! This is to be total destruction - men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys - the works. (15:3)
- Saul and the army made an exception for Agag, and for the choice sheep and cattle. They didn't include them under the terms of the holy ban. But all the rest, which nobody wanted anyway, they destroyed as decreed by the holy ban. (15:8-9)
- By the time Samuel caught up with him, Saul had just finished an act of worship, having used Amalekite plunder for the burnt offerings sacrificed to God. (15:12)
- As Samuel came close, Saul called out, "God's blessings on you! I accomplished God's plan to the letter!" (15:13)
- "Only some Amalekite loot," said Saul, "The soldiers saved back a few of the choice cattle and sheep to offer up in sacrifice to God. But everything else was destroyed under the holy ban." ((15:15)
- Saul defended himself, "What are you talking about? I did obey God. I did the job God set for me...So the soldiers saved back a few choice sheep and cattle from the holy ban for sacrifice to God at Gilgal - what's wrong with that?" (15:20-21)
- [Saul] went to Carmel to set up a victory monument in his own honor, and then was headed for Gilgal. (15:11)
- Samuel said, 'God has just now torn the kingdom from you, and handed it over to your neighbor, a better man than you are."...Saul tried again, "I have sinned. But don't abandon me! Support me with your presence before the leaders and the people." (15:28-30)
As I think about Saul's actions and responses, I see how easy it is for me to fall into the same traps. As I choose to ignore the reality of my own sin, act like I'm doing well in following God when I'm not, make excuses for the areas where I sin (especially my subtle or "respectable" sins), and care more about how I look to others, I am in grave danger of ending up somewhere I don't want to be - out of fellowship with God and deceived about my own sinfulness and unholiness.
"There is no such thing as a small sin. Every unconfessed sin is a seed that will produce a multiplied harvest. As Charles Spurgeon warned: "Those who tolerate sin in what they think to be little things, will soon indulge it in greater matters."
The moral or spiritual landslides that take us by surprise most often occur because we have paid little or no attention to the cracks and fissures in our walk with God and our moral conduct. Seemingly small, "harmless" compromises snowball and set the stage for tragic consequences." Nancy Leigh DeMoss, HolinessIt's true in Saul's life, and we're witnessing the tragic consequences. But it's also true in my life.
"We, the readers, know that from this point on, we'll be reading the story of the dismantling of Saul as king, and it will have nothing to do with the Philistines [or Amalekites]. It will have been caused from within, by Saul's defection from God, thus illustrating that the inner world of the heart is far more real a battleground than the outer world of nations warring against other nations." Eugene Peterson, Conversations, pg. 410
It makes me wonder, am I even battling for my heart, am I even putting up a fight? Where am I allowing the subtle sins of ungodliness, pride, dishonesty, unthankfulness, and unforgiveness to fester in my soul? And where am I ignoring the blatant sins like anger, gossip, impatience, selfishness, and coarse language?
4 comments:
Cici, I was overwhelmed by yesterday's reading. Thank you for putting it into categories that help me evaluate my relationship with God. I can identify with each of Saul's life lessons in some way.
I thought it was interesting in 16:14-16 how Saul's advisors tried to make him feel better when he was in his black mood by anesthetizing and distracting (listen to some soothing music!). I'm grateful for the journey with you all on this blog that doesn't allow us to excuse or comfort one another in our sin, but the challenge to actually deal with the root of our sin so that we can move into true joy in our relationships with God.
Just a couple of thoughts from our readings the last couple of days.
1. I was pierced by Staci's blog about how I can make my "mother/wife" duties my king. How I feel great when I have it all under control etc. I want my God to be my king not my time management skills or lack of these skills. I have peace when things are in order so I naturally do whatever it takes to have this peace. God is my king, not the goal of peace. I continue to struggle with this.
2. Today's reading, "God sees the heart". I love this! Help me Lord to see someone's heart and not their appearance. I too often judge in a nano second someone based on their appearance. I have always struggled with this sin and have shared this with my Lord. I am working on this.
3. I also love reading the story of David through this version. How great is his faith and how inspired I am by it. So glad our God is on our side. I want to read this bible version to Luke when he gets home from preschool.
4. Saul's "black mood". Did God give him depression? Hmmm? I have never thought that depression was something God would give someone. Not sure what to think about that.
Continued thanks to Staci and CiCi for your provoking blogs and commitment. May God continue to bless you richly!
I'm struggling with just seeing all of this sin so clearly in front of me, like a mirror. The Word is like a mirror right now to my life, showing me the many ways I'm unholy. And the ways that I desire to grow closer to God and desire to be more sanctified. Because I can barely stand it. Just like these life lessons from Saul-ignoring the inconvenient parts of God's plan- pretending that i'm following God sometimes- making excuses for my sin and disobedience and caring more about how others view me than God. I think I also just struggle a lot with letting my emotions control my daily rather than the Spirit leading me.
I'm struggling because when I see all of this, I can just easily get so discouraged that I am not loving God enough or that God has just so much to deal with in me. Or that all of this comes down to just enjoying God and trusting Him and His love. For me right now- it's coming down to just knowing I will continue to pursure Him for Him and sit in His delight, knowing that I am FREE from trying to be perfect or clean up myself before I come to Him. But for some reason, this is harder to do now...I'm going to pray though and pray that the more I see my sin, instead of the more guilt or discouraged I am- that I would see His love for me more and be able to be more encouraged. This is hard right now though. I would really appreciate prayers- I hate the "feeling" of feeling like I am slipping into a new season with me and my God, I just want to cling to His love. Thanks for reading and walking with me.
Christina - I hear you! I am, in fact, struggling with the very same things you mention.
My view of my sin is overwhelming me, and I have gotten discouraged as well. That's why I love the glimpses we see of Jesus in the Old Testament. It reminds me that there's HOPE, that the Good News is coming. But in order to truly appreciate the Good News of Jesus, we have to understand our need for a Savior.
That's what God's doing in us through this reading, and THAT IS A GIFT FROM THE LORD! Keep at it, my friend. Keep praying for God to show you His perspective.
I really appreciate you sharing what's going on. It's nice to know I'm not alone. I'm praying for you!
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