I live here, too - I, God, live in the same neighborhood with the People of Israel. (35:34)I have to keep reminding myself that God has been with the Israelites for the entire 40 years in the wilderness, every step of the way. They've been packing and unpacking the Tent of Meeting at every campsite. And these 40 years haven't just been about punishment. It's been years of the day-in and day-out training of His unruly adolescents. They keep acting like teenagers - complaining, rebelling, and demanding their own way - and He keeps acting like the One True God - loving, disciplining and training in righteousness.
They have underestimated the "severity of God's love" and His commitment to them. Have I done the same thing?
"My servant C.S. Lewis got it right: I'm not safe, but I am good. I will not coddle you any more than a good surgeon only hugs a cancer-stricken child. I will not coddle you, but I will purify you. And that takes more, though not less, than a hug...
You will experience terrible failure and crushing conflict on the road that leads to where I'm taking you, but it is the right road even when it feels like it's killing you....
Don't be shocked when you read how severely I dealt with [the Israelites] because of their presumption and unbelief. I hate sin, and I will punish sinners. That's part of My plan. But know this: I only kill to resurrect. Everything in you that's bad I destroy in order to release everything in you that's good. And I know goodness is in you, lodged deeper in your heart than badness. I know because I put it there. It's the goodness of My Son." 66 LLI have been shocked by how God has dealt with the rebellion. Sometimes it's been hard to read. Certainly no coddling here. But even more, I'm thankful for the glimpses of Jesus Christ in this book. It reminds me that whatever difficult work God is doing in my own heart, it's for a purpose. He's killing to resurrect.
"I think I'm getting the idea that trusting and following You is a big deal, the biggest deal of all. That's something I need to remember." 66 LL
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We're at the end of our fourth Love Letter! I pray that God is doing as much in you as He's doing in me. Truthfully, it feels very messy right now. I feel undone, with no clear resolution in sight. But I think that's probably the point. I'm trying to enjoy, not just endure, the process, trusting that God will work it all out in His timing.
How about you? What's God saying to you in Numbers? We'd love to hear from you.
2 comments:
I feel like God is trying to kill some dead weight of sin in my life and everything feels undone. Loose ends everywhere from my messy desk to relational stuff with my kids and husband to tasks and events that I can't get scheduled. And that's just the external stuff! Internally, I'm fighting Him on this "death to resurrect" that He's working in me. I don't like feeling out of control; don't like that I can't see the results clearly; don't like that my emotions aren't exactly joyful.
He keeps calling me back to the truth in the midst of this mess: "I live here, too -- I, God, live in the same neighborhood" (35:34). He is with me and calling me to die to myself and the feeling of order (everything and everyone in their place)I long for than I long for Him.
Yay!! I'm back in community!
It's been sad to not be able to keep up with the blog while I didn't have computer access but when I got back, I was able to catch up on the reading and praise God, He helped me get caught up!!! I thought about just jumping back in and saving numbers for later but I just felt on my heart the desire to learn more about Him through reading it now. I've really just been SO blessed to learn so much and feel like I know God so much more. It really is a journey!!
I've been able to journal a lot and blog a little about what I've been learning, so i'm very thankful. I'm reading the tniv version instead of the message version of the Bible and even though its different, i realize how much I get to learn from reading your thoughts that help to clear up so much that I don't understand on my own. I underline a lot and write lots of questions and remarks on the sides of my Bible so its very helpful to be plugged in here for more wisdom, imagery, thoughts, prayers and everything. :)
I can't believe we've finished numbers!! it's exciting! I'm learning how thankful I am for the delight and joy in having a REAL intimate relationship with God. And just His grace in the midst of our imperfections and wickedness. His holiness and serious hatred for sin shows me more and more, our real need for Jesus' death. He's got us. Thank God!
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